mostly useless ramblings

Update . . its been a while

2007-09-24T07:05:58Z

So it has been a very long time since I last updated. And a lot has changed. I’ve graduated High School, I’m working a stable job as a house painter with this really nice old man, Bruce, we’re working in West Seattle right now. Currently I only really hang out with Billy, occasionally Shager and that whole crowd, and of course the few friends I have left back at Shorecrest. But these days I pretty much keep to myself, playing World of Warcraft and Wii, it’s solitary but I like it like that.

I have never been a social person, I always liked to spend my time inside playing legos and watching TV, flipping on the Nintendo or Sega occasionally but rarely going outside to play with other kids or just go outside at all. My parents spoiled me a bit, my mom was practically my slave throughout elementary school and I am ashamed of doing that to her, she has been a wonderful mother and I love her. I have never had more than 3 good friends at any given time . . there was a point I had many friends, but none of them knew me nor did I know them well enough.

Anyways, I have come to realize that as a teenager in high school I made a lot more mistakes than I should have. If I wasn’t bitching to the few friends nice enough to listen, I was creating drama over juvenile things or doing something pointless. My lack of understanding of social behavior and my own emotions drove many people away and later abuse of Marijuana pushed practically everyone out of my life. And yes, I still smoke pot, and no, I still don’t understand people or socializing very well. I am not proud of many of the things I did, but the mistakes and plunders I made then make me who I am now, and for that I am not ashamed. No one will ever have a life story like mine, and that is something I can be proud of.

I am a different person now, last winter I broke my foot severely and was bedridden for 3 months, and I’ll tell ya, three months of doing nothing will change anyone’s life view. I'm still pretty much the same Erik, just much less bitchy and moany and emo, I've finally grown out of that stupid 'woe is me' shit. Given I still haven’t beaten depression completely or found true direction in my life, I have goals and dreams that are realistic and achievable, no more hopeless, romantic, idealistic crap. My views on religion and politics have changed, no more of that wicca and anarchy bull, I like nature and all and concider natural icons divine much more than the god of the nation. Government is a terrible thing but civilization and society is dependant on it, without it we are pathetic creatures, but with it we are corrupt beings, its kind of a lose - lose situation, but the organized manner is much more profitable and trendy. Oh, and I'm a big cynic, if ya couldn't tell.

Here’s what I want to do with my life: Join the Coast Guard in order to appease my personal moral obligation to earn my civil rights as an American and citizen. Create lots of nifty things with clay and metal, I am an artist and sculpture is my medium, I would like to develop this a great deal. I want a family at some point, no rush for that. To live in Alaska or another arctic, mountainous region has always been a dream, I will try and be stationed in Alaska with the Coast Guard, hopefully that’ll fly. I want to be involved in politics, perhaps not as a leader but definitely somewhere where I can change things, help people live better, somehow. I want to be a teacher, too, I’m not sure of what, maybe history or something in that line, social studies or art for sure.

Um, what else is there to update on . . I got a tattoo, its the scorpio symbol (the one in my icon) and I plan on getting my Eyebrow pierced soon as well. I’ve been single for almost a year now, had a small fling in the beginning of August but have had pretty much 0 luck with the ladies. That has always bugged me, I am insecure about companionship, codependent maybe, but it has become much less of an issue to my persona, all desires can be silenced and none should obstruct ones personality to the extent that it used to with me. I let my inner child (aka: inner whiney bitch) get the best of me but I beat that fucking infant and tossed his ass outside.

Life has been pretty good to me, since I woke up and noticed that it has something to offer, I just have to stop waiting for it and get it myself. As of late work has been rough and I was hoping to get a few classes at SCC but never signed up cause I got lazy, but a bit more time off school might be good. I’m gunna be moving in to an apartment on 15th with Billy sometime after my birthday and will be holding off on that whole Coast Guard life commitment thing for another year. I’ve got the rest of my life ahead of me, a little while to enjoy my youth wouldn’t hurt, I’m not doing any drugs harder than weed and the occasional drink, I’m in excellent shape (even running a few times a week) and in my prime. I am currently in between milestones right now, graduating and getting a job then moving out that is. And I’m actually optimistic about the future, my own and others ? it’s good.

I’ll probably be updating more, it’s nice to just . . write. I do so much thinking its relieving to spill something, even if it is on an internet journal.

$%@!!

2007-06-30T11:03:37Z

Fuck my luck.
I swear I'm cursed.
Grrrrr!!

Boring

2007-03-29T05:59:30Z

I am enjoying life quite a bit, having a lot of fun playing video games and doing nothing... but thats nothing new than what i've done all my life and the ideas building up in my head are overwhelming me. But I cant find the modivation to actually do anything about it.
I did, finally, after a lot of wasted time, get community service stuff set up for the last 38 hours I need...by april 30th, ugh. Sr Project is all done, just wating on panels, that should be fun. School is very lame, especially when 90% of the people you hang out with on a regular basis aren't in school. Fuck the education system.
Much time has been spent refining my stand on things and beliefs. I dont like how the world is run, I want to change it...for now all I can do is try and help one person at a time get over something that hurts them. Im trying to inspire people more...get em thinking, I hope I really have helped.
It's late now, I should go to bed. Goddamn Highschool!

Self censoring will now begin

2007-01-25T08:10:06Z

Looking back...I was a bit harsh. Very harsh, irrational and foolish. What can I say...I got cought up in the writting and focussed on all the negativity on the subject, turning possibility to fact and rumors to truth. . . . My bad.
I fucked up again, the message I thought I was displaying was overruled by a mess of anger. I disagree with what many people out there do, especially when it comes to objectifying other people in any way, degrading them and disprespecting them, and when someone I know quite well continuously does these things it..I dunno, I feel some obligation to express my objection to their behavior, but this is by far the worst medium to express anything other than angsty, over dramatic updates on life and random, pointless opinions.
There will be no more of these such entries, I wont ever openly critisize any single person or group of persons known directly by anyone. Er...I wont slander anyone that matters, somethin like that. Rants on Bush or some douche like that dont count are fine, but if its somone people know personally, and I have a very strong opinion towards, then my mouth is fucking shut. If there is some kind of issue between me and anyone, it will be, as far as my power allows, between me and them.

goddamn foot

2006-12-19T17:09:08Z

so im off to surgury. i'll be gone till thursday. able to see visiters on wednesday though *hinthint*
wish me luck.

6 days

2006-11-06T15:14:19Z

wow...in six days i will be a responcible adult. only i can be accountable for my actions, no more blaming parents or having scapegoats, no more childish immaturity, i'll be able to vote and tried as an adult...not to mention buy cigarettes, porn and parephenelia. oh, and get tattoos and my own piercings, yay! im very excited for that. almost as excited as i am for friday, da party. everyone* is welcome and no gifts are necessary, your simple pressence is more than enough to please me. but if you feel the need to do anything, a couple bucks for the tattoo would be greatly appreciated since i know some of you wont listen to the no gift policy. thanks.
i had a long weekend, played way too much risk. 11 hours. is about 7 hours too long for anything. i dont ever wanna see a world map or roman numerals again. oh hey, its raining...whend that happen? well i guess with the whole winter thing the rain kinda comes...but g2g. shit, bye.

not good

2006-11-02T01:04:08Z

i do not feel well, not well at all. physically. mentally. emotionally. im just in the shits. i think im getting sick, been coughing and sneezing a lot and my sinuses are clogged, which makes for an obnoxiously runny nose, bleh. i relapsed again last night, halloween, its really hard to turn it down when all of your closest friends are around you doing it, i wish i was stronger, but im not giving up hope. and last but most certainly not least, things are still very confused, i dont know whats happening or what has happened or what will happen, but i do know if something doesnt happen soon im not going to be able to make things happen later, yeah...confusing for those of you that dont know the whole story, and its like that for a reason. but im really down still, very unwanted, neglected, unloved, feeling ugly, stupid, hated, its not cool and im all emo and shit because of it.
im filming for my little movie tomarrow, that might be fun...or it could be really stressful, we shall see. blah. i had a whole bunch more to say but i got a killer headache and stomach ache and grrr, body hates me. so i guess thats all for now. later.

Politics

2006-10-22T01:06:53Z

Politics are a funny thing. As was displayed very humorously last night and this morning as Chad tried to debate with Aislinn, Meredith and Caitlin about various things, the most notable being Chad’s choice to go into the Air Force and reject his numerous College acceptations. It was moments after the three young women stated that they had dropped out (at least Aislinn and Caitlin did, I am unsure about Meredith) and Chad and I had a little laugh. Not to be rude or condescending over the girls, but it was quite amusing to see them arguing over something and have it turned around on them. One might go as far as to call them hypocrites, though I do not think of them as so, this surely was an error of attention on their part.

So why bring up this minor event? Because I felt like it, which leads me to my purpose, to ask more rhetorical questions and answer them myself.

When Politics come to mind, what does one think of? Government, Order, Law, Politicians, maybe even Church, Business, Society, all of which are correct and great answers. But what is the point of bringing them up? Again, because I feel like it, and it’s great for context.

Moving down to the specifics of Politics, its individual branches, I first turn to Government and must wonder, what do I want? What exactly does the government do for me, and what do I do for it, just as the late JFK once articulated. And why does it all matter? Now for my point.

Every person wants something different, there are no two people that agree on everything, with one or two exceptions of ‘soul mates’ or the mentally ill who believe they do. So when it comes to how the world should be run, no one is going to think the same, they will all have different ideas and beliefs, different methods, different goals, but in the end it comes down to how it will all work, which is by far the most difficult stage.

It is because of these large gaps between people’s views that all forms of government eventually fail, the greatest societies and cultures destroyed because they couldn’t get along. Even without set order, without the politics of government, with anarchy, no one would agree either, there would be even more chaos than there is, it would be hell on earth, constant battle and war. And that sucks. A lot.

Personally I believe that the government should play a very small roll in our daily lives, they should go unseen, keeping our international affairs, property, freedoms and lives safe, and that is it. They do not need to control pornography, nor drugs, nor what any man woman or anything in between does in their own home, of course as long as it does not physical, mental or emotional harm to another citizen. But in order to gain the rights to do whatever you want, you must do something for your country. Social services, education, sanitation, forestry, something to benefit the whole of the nation and not just your family would be mandatory. Along with civil duties such as law enforcement, military involvement, city management and political activism are necessary to earn the freedoms I speak of in my “dream government.”

My ideals are very liberal, I have classified myself, as much as I hate to, as a Libertarian. The laws that should be in place should only protect our basic freedoms and those petty laws for parking, trespassing, etc. what really matters is keeping life, property and freedom safe. “Not to live life as a man likes is the mark of the slave” – Aristotle, is a quote I strongly believe in, and I refuse to bear the mark of any slave, be it to self, man, machine or nature.

Next on to Church, the religious aspect of politics and society. First I must point out that our forefathers were Christian, yes, but not a single document of our nation claims that our nation is “Under (Christian) God.” Most were more of agnostics than anything, believing in the possibility of a higher power but not denying the facts of science. Which is where I fall, though the idea of Christ is not appealing to me, nor is the Christian, Protestant, Catholic, Baptist or any other fucking sect, I happen to follow a remake of an ancient religion. I am Wiccan, still in development of course, I learn more and more of this practice every day and with each hour my pleasure in it grows.

I do not think that the measure many religious groups are correct, nor righteous, nor moral, they are putting literal translations on ideas, taking the thoughts of a book, or pastor or whatever and moving a step too far. If it were not for religious extremists, medicine would be evolved far beyond its current state, which is a field I have mixed feelings for, but that will be for another rant. It is because of mans gullibility and undeniable desire for answers to unanswerable questions that drives him to believe the unbelievable and follow the masses. These men aren’t the worst of them all, but they certainly are not the best, justifying their sins by begging a priest for forgiveness, walking through a gateway or praying enough, it is disgusting to know they believe themselves not guilty due to god’s presence.

True not all men of faith are dimwitted enough to be lead by incompetent ministers preaching words spoken by martyrs and saints hundreds of years ago that probably do not ring as true today as they did centuries ago. Most do not buy into the lies and strict code of their church, they make their own ethical and moral decisions, but it is the ones who do not, the conservative, ignorant bunch, denying facts for faith and keeping people back, pushing them away from their dreams, who I despise. They claim they are making sure the world stays in order, but they do this by ignoring reality, creating their own facts and denying men what they desire, hindering them of their goals for the sake of morality and faith.

Businesses, Corporations, Franchises, Markets, are the downfall and uprising of all societies. For without them we do not prosper, we whither and die, but with them we corrupt, become greedy and selfish. Aristotle also said that there must be a large middle class to maintain a democracy, large enough to keep the upper class from gaining too much influence and the lower class from revolting. But thousands of years from his last publishing, we insult him by turning America into a democracy ruled by the high and upper-middle classes, hated by the poor and envied by the low-middle class. A vote is only as equal as its voter’s pocket book is balanced.

Research companies, weapon manufacturers and trade good refiners influence the government, in whole, more than the middle and lower classes can compete with. They place their greasy, bloodstained hands into the wallets of politicians, lubing them up so they can slide in to office a little easier and make their jobs that much more comfortable and simple to complete.

Family owned businesses that were once the sign of America’s great accomplishments now stand under the shadow of franchise corporations, McDonalds, Starbucks, Wal-Mart, who say they give equal business opportunities to the working man, but take away his own building and replace it with a facility seen a block away. Charging ten times more than adequate for something fake and tainted by the evil of man, the chemicals and additives leaching the pockets of citizens for the sake of greed and ‘business.’ Disgusting.

And there you have it, a two page summary of Erik’s Political views, never let it be said that I did not think hard on where I want my life to go. My actions, however, are a different story, a different argument, but one I never agreed to dispute, though if anyone wishes to seek revenge or punishment for things I have said or done, may they speak now. I will respectively receive any due punishment for what I am held guilty for, the consequences, though, must be equal to my wrong doings, of course. The Fifth Amendment is one I do not see fit for anytime other than in a court of law. But do not degrade me for trying to justify any action i still see as right by doing, for i will defend what i believe is noble.

hexadude @ 2006-09-12T12:43:00

2006-09-12T19:46:15Z

hey assholes.
stop arguing an idea. there is no point in fighting opinions and beliefs, only enlightening those who have them, so stop being bitches, dont be rude, and fucking talk to one another rather than verbally assaulting anyone who has an opposing view on something.
simone and adrian, your thoughts are good, but please state them a bit more politely and less attacking, we arent arguing, we are learning.

Why Anarchy

2006-09-12T02:49:56Z

It is our government that has failed us; the very machine we created to avoid lies, prevent corruption and end a reign of greed has become just that. It has become something to be feared, an entity that strikes down all that oppose it, destroys anything different and strange, often in the name of a deity not all of it’s occupants believe in. Calling for equality and justice for all…who pledge themselves to a lying, cheating nation
We are not ruled by a man, he is but a monkey pushing buttons on the machine of culture. The administration he picked is but a sham, individuals working for personal political gain, McCarthyists and thieves. They use our resources under our nose and overcharge what is left over from monstrous research programs towards better weaponry, better ways to wage war.
The businesses we rely on rely on us even more to give into their plots of commercialization, selling us poor grade products at high-grade prices. They fill our produce with chemicals and hormones used to develop the plant or animal faster and fatter. Sales are used to give us a false security of savings, while the corporations are raking in millions from our gullibility and willingness to waste hard earned money on trivial equipment and useless possessions.
Schools are used to lead us into a consumer life, a life spent in front of televisions working low wages because it is what is given to us by the system. We are educated only as much as the government sees fit, any other schooling, any more learning comes with a price. But the real jobs, the highest paying and most comfortable of labor comes not from construction, not farming, not real work, but from watching it all be done. The richest and most powerful men got to where they are because they wanted more and would do anything they could to get it, even at the expense of worker’s or consumer’s health.
Democracy died long ago. Voting does no more than placing your candidates sign on a lawn, it is all for show. The election that put the monkey we hate into power was rigged, there is no question. Florida voted for Gore, not this shrub of a man, but our electoral college made the real decision; it was our state representatives that failed us all, not that scrotum of a state.

Now the question, is there any way to change this corrupted system of hate? But of course. As the late, great, fictional hero of mine, Tyler Durden once said, “it is only after we have lost everything that we are free to do anything.” Which simply means that in order to progress our society, our culture, our way of life any higher, we must tear it down. Anarchy.
After the dictators of our nation have been silenced, once cows eat nothing but grass, stores sell food with nothing but food in it, money is a minor tool and not as important as water and air, when houses and clothes reflect the owner rather than the creator, when we can learn, say and do anything, anytime, anywhere, then we will be great. Then we will be complete and worthy of being the strongest nation on this planet, until then we are weak, we are ignorant and we are pawns.

Feel free to comment on anything you agree/disagree with, anything i might have missed or whatever you might think. But dont you dare tell me i am wrong, these are MY views, MY opinions, though time might change them, no one has the right to deny them.

my goddamn aunt - a poem by erik norem

2006-09-04T23:26:56Z

it was late at night, i sat and watched,
infomercials on roll-on grass;
when my channel surfing was interupted,
by the crash of broken glass.

i took a glane down the hall,
only to stop and stare.
holy crap my fucking aunt,
fell down the goddamn stairs.

thirteen bottles of pills she brought,
to knock her ass to bed;
she awoke half way through a window,
with birds chirping around her head.

next time i hope she downs them all,
so i dont have to hear her dramatic tales;
about her adventures in lala land,
and detailed graphics of her entrails.

do you really have nothing better to do?

2006-06-04T19:04:38Z

goddamnit leave me alone.
why are people all of a sudden so fuckin worried about me? things are fine, maybe a bit fucked up but they always are and i am dealing with shit better now than ever. so why the concern when things are good and not when they were bad? wtf? it doesnt make any sense...ah!
and you, fuck off! i have not said anything to or about you in weeks, i hate you, you hate me, we disagree with everything, leave it at that and shut up. yeah, i smoke weed, thats no secret, though it is a problem, but everyone has problems, complaining about it and stating that they are bad people because of it fixes nothing. if you could just shut the hell up now and get out of my life which you ditest so much, that would be great, and i will let you be and you can fuck all the minors you want.
now that thats done with, im going to go do some homework and yard work and shit so i can have freedoms again. later
-papa smurf

hexadude @ 2006-05-23T23:01:00

2006-05-24T06:04:38Z

is it just me or do things seem to be really crappy today?
and im pretty sure im fucking everything up...again. grr.

oh, and that post directed towards adrian is now unlocked, i forgot about the comment thing, but its fixed now.

it needs to be friday.

goodnight.

bubble bobble

2006-05-23T14:09:28Z

ok, so im going to my first rave on friday. stayin clean for it, i can roll any other time or smoke whenever, dont need no narcotics to have fun. but im sad right now, i lost my kandi, as much as i dislike the ravers that wear the beads up and down their arms and everywhere else, it is kinda cool to have a little thing you made yourself, or one you got from someone awesome.
however, i have encountered a problem with this rave...i have no ride to it. rogers workin on gettin my ticket, cause hes cool, so i can get in, i just cant get there...help! megan is there any room left in your car? god, is ed takin ya there? tom? anyone?
i love my hair, its all purpley right now but still friggen awesome, the colors are never quite the same depending on the light. tonight im gunna wash it and the purple will fade to blue and hopefully be even better. i got lotsa compliments and only a few insults, one by some preppy bitch i dont even know, i really felt like tripping her.
oh, whose going to folklife? cause im thinkin i might spend the entire weekend there...although i've said that about everything and only lasted 1 day, but eh, i might actually go all 3 days i can (as much as i want to, cant go friday). but yeah, who be goin and would ya like to meet up with me?
now tis time to go, gotta wake shagers redneck ass up and get to school. later.

adrian drama

2006-05-21T18:39:07Z

ok, so heres my side of what the hell is going on:
i dislike adrian, he has been mostly rude to me except at hotwire, and im not sure why that is but i suspect deception. he and his friends have been insulting me for a long time now and i have struck back, but this argument over nothing continues, and i have given the argument a point. my intent is this, get adrian off of his throne, hes no better than anyone else, he may have a high vocabulary and an intelect of twelve and a half midgets (which is pretty friggen high even though they are short). I would like to explain the rumors he and many other people have heard first hand rather than this chiain of diluted truths and false events. so all adrian has to do is let me explain shit and he is more than welcome to state what happened with the rumors i have heard. simle as that and i completely ignore his livejournal and i expect he will do the same.
that is all.

in other news, gettin my hair dyed today, FINALLY! blue. sweet. shall be awesome.
and im now gettin paid $10 an hour to do yard work instead of the less-than-minimum-wage sum of $7. kenji and i transplanted 4 plants yesterday and got $20, its pretty cool. so now im going to eat my breakfast and then go shopping and get some new clothes and hair. later.

might as well...

2006-05-20T02:18:15Z

Comments are screened. If you've ever had a smidgen of a crush on me, or need to tell me anything, feel free to comment below. I won't mock you, and only you and I will ever know. Then post it in your own LJ.

hexadude @ 2006-05-03T16:12:00

2006-05-03T23:18:44Z

i tore a ligament in my left leg. i cant run for 2 weeks :( now how the fuck am i gunna get places? walking hurts like a bitch, i limp a little and stairs are impossible. i think i tore it saturday night when i sprinted to kellogg from kegans house.
and thank you mormon for the advise, it made me think. im not really all that comfortable with myself, and i gotta change that. need something to do also, and something to be proud of, cause so far im just another guy, i cant do anything spectacularly awesome or even remotely cool, its kinda sad. so, my mission for anytime after this week (i am swamped with homework and drama) is to look for more jobs, dye my hair (maybe, need job first, they might not like that..so yeah) get ears peirced, learn more songs with da bass, work more with clay, find another hobby and learn how to be comfortable with myself.
oh, i found somethin pretty sweet, TOOL! they kick ass, totally my kinda music, how did i not hear them before!? i must learn how to play like they do, its amazing.
well, i gotsta go to my therapist now, got a whole buncha new things to tell him...*sigh* grr to drama! later

hexadude @ 2006-05-02T21:54:00

2006-05-03T04:58:03Z

life is getting more and more confusing by the minute.
why cant i have some normal friends :-P
*edit* scratch normal, replace with 'less fucked up/insane' you literal bastards.

THANKS DAD!

2006-05-01T13:43:05Z

i wake up late, hes still in the fucking shower, i sleep in another 10 minutes and hes finally done, take my shower, get out and heres dad holding my progress report from US history. its not even SEVEN O'CLOCK! and hes already fucking bitching at me for having a C- and not a goddamn A.
FUCK YOU! does he not fucking realize that no matter what HE does, it wont have any major impact on the amount of homework i do or dont do!? its something I have to do because its MY homework and MY goddamn life! AAAH!
things just keep falling more and more apart and i dont even know where to begin puting them back together. i do the right thing and turn around and theres a knife in my back. i try and make things work with school but its just not enough, the only way he'll ever get off my fucking back is with a 4.0, and there is no way in hell thats going to happen, so FUCK HIM! i barely want to even complete highschool, let alone my classes.
on top of all that my belt broke so i have to fucking duct tape it back together. what a wonderful way to start your day :D
fuck off.

hexadude @ 2006-04-28T06:40:00

2006-04-28T13:52:54Z

two kinda interesting things happened yesterday...and these bagels are increadibly stale, ew....but the things, yes. first i saw i ghost. on the bus ride to school i looked out the window like usual and at this one corner i saw a boy in a gray shirt with kinda a fro thing goin on staring at those metal guard rails holding somethin in his hand, he just kinda sat there. then i asked corry what he thought about this kid staring and standing and he replied 'what kid?' i looked back and he was gone. which makes me either schitsophrenic, or hes a ghost/ninja.
then on my way walking home from the mall i spotted a dog half way up the hill just wonderin around, so i caught her and read her tags, called the number and heres the convorsation i had with the owner (im in caps) "hello? HI I HAVE YOUR DOG. really, where? CORNER OF 284th STREET AND 47th AVE. oh, just down there? well let her go, she'll find her way home, bye." and he hung up. wonder why the dog left? hmm, thats a real toughy.
i wonder what im doing tonight...i got 3 movies to watch and no one to watch them with :'( oh wait! cept for megan, yay megan! i miss that girl, barely see her anymore, tis sad. hmm, come to think of it i miss a lot of people. emi, anna, olivia, shawndea, mormon, devin, keith, tanner, havent really hung out with any of those people in a while, emi and tanner more recently than the rest, but dont ever really see the others.
well ima go throw away these nasty ass bagels...so disapointing, i was hoping for breakfast and got a hard chunk of bread covered in cheese. later.

eventful ish day

2006-04-28T02:15:24Z

so...after school i had a dentist appointment at like 3:45, and rather than going all the way home just to come back to the relative area of shorecrest, i walked to North City Dental. i got there at exactly 3 and decided to wonder some more. headed up to tiffs but shes lame and wasnt home, so i walked over to the library to study (yes, i do that sometimes) because i had nothing better to do, then went and got my fillings while listenin to the gorillaz.
then after i got home and ate myself a nice little stake samich, i walked down to the mall and did what i've been planning and saying i'll do for an eternity and a half, i APPLIED FOR A JOB! sure its at albertsons and i'll be a bag boy, but its a job none the less, somethin to put on my resume and give me a bit a money. i also ran into Mike, this dude in my 5th period that i've talked to, he works conveniently at albertsons and i told him he should put in a good word for me, but coincidently hes quitting, which means theres a spot open, and he will infact recomend me because hes pretty cool. and anyone else (janine and/or becky) workin at albertsons would kick some hardcore ass if they also put in a good word and i will love them forever.
then i did another thing i've really been meanin to do, paid off my late fees at hollywood video, but not just $5...ALL OF IT! total of 16.92 which leaves me with 1.08 for the next week + another $2 cause i owe jew ten bucks. ah, so many numbers!
*sigh* now ima go practice my bass, hopefully learn a new song or get better with a different one or somethin like that. then probably watch one a the movies i rented and maybe hang out with tom and most likely shagger when he gets off work. later.

hexadude @ 2006-04-25T06:49:00

2006-04-25T13:52:41Z

not only is quesadilla dead, tacos nearly there with her and chalupas not far behind. there must have been some virus or somethin spread into their cage, maybe some infection from tacos tumor wound? maybe somethin from the many sick people that have been in my house that mutated to get rats? who knows, all i know is that my rats are dying slowly and it sucks, but its not painfully at least, im giving them all a tiny bit of tacos pain medication from her tumor, that will hopefully help them if they are hurting at all.
i should really think about sleeping and doing my homework, it might help.
later.

hexadude @ 2006-04-12T19:45:00

2006-04-13T02:50:01Z

well, spring break is basically half way over...fuck. and i havent done shit. i've been doin a lotta home and yard work, thats been exciting, hangin out with shagger every day and billy most a the time too. i've also been smokin quite a bit, a bit more than id like, but eh, i get my work done and then have my fun.
theres not a whole lot to report in my life. learned some new songs on my bass, thats pretty sweet, and uh....yeah, thats about it. um...oh, zelda is a pain in the ASS, it wont let me win...fucking master quest. yeah, thats all. later.

hexadude @ 2006-04-06T06:43:00

2006-04-06T13:49:17Z

im alive again! my head doesnt want to explode and my stomach doesnt want to implode, its a great feeling. im goin to school today...but only to tell mr eichner im gunna make up the final after spring break because i missed one of the most important days, then go do my math final cause its gunna be hella fuckin easy, and then go sit there and watch people fuck up during speech, should be fun.
i had a dream last night i had a 2 inch dick, fucked some random chick through the window downstairs and...well yeah, it was desgusting and very pathetic, but it was kinda cool because it was so unrealistic i knew it was a dream. then there was somethin about this two girls (one looked/sounded like ricka) at a convinience store that were harassing the cashier and cops came and stuff, then billy and shagger were freakin out cause they were high and i told em just to chill and go back to looking for stuff, but no, they rushed into the car. dumbasses. then i was stuck next to josh robinson in the back and...yeah. then the zombies bit my dog and i had to fly around shootin the mother fuckers, it was pretty crazy.
anyways...whats going on this weekend? or rather whats going on during SPRING BREAK!? woot! someones gotta be havin a kickass party, cause if not im gunna have to, and...well thats actually not a problem, but thats besides the point. call me if you wanna hang out at all.
bleh, i hate wakin up this early...i sorta wish i was still sick so i could sleep in. later.

hexadude @ 2006-04-04T21:48:00

2006-04-05T05:00:34Z

bleh. i hate being sick. almost as much as i hate being depressed. stupid cycle...must...kill..it. been makin all sortsa realizations and such lately, now i just need to turn those thoughts into actions and things will hopefully get better. no, they will get better.
i slept 15 hours last night/today and now i cant get to sleep :( and my moms all pissy because im not in bed, but screw her, you cant expect someone to get to sleep right away when they've been awake for only 8 hours and have done nothing but watch an evening with kevin smith (great movie, thanks jew) and play video games.
this has certainly been one of the most eventful weeks in the past several months...its a bit overwhelming and very confusing, but im learnin even more about myself and the world around me, and thats never bad. i've found a lot of my 'freinds' arent very good at being freinds, in fact, most of them suck balls at it and i think im gunna like...not be freinds with them anymore or something else logical like that. then there are other people that i really want to get closer too, but im sorta hesitant on that because im wierd and stuff. blah. i think im done talking now. my brains all messed up right now, as is the rest of my body, stupid crappy immune system. well im gunna try and get some sleep. later.